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Post by Val on Feb 9, 2020 4:14:44 GMT
Freya was walking down a familiar path. Towering trees surrounded her, their leafy limbs reaching out to brush her arms as she walked. Her feet were bare, soaking in the feel of the moist earth with each step. She reached a small clearing and turned in a slow circle, realizing that the path had abruptly ended, or maybe there hadn't been a path at all. Everything blended together until the trees no longer looked like trees at all, but walls, blocking her from traveling any further. Darkness appeared to be seeping toward her, threatening to swallow her whole. She collapsed to the forest floor as the darkness morphed into faces, the tree limbs mutated into hands that were reaching for her. Voices arose in a whispered chorus, growing louder and closer, speaking her name endlessly and begging for help. One of the figures suddenly formed in front of her, clear as day, and grabbed her wrist.
Freya screamed and launched upright, her round eyes flashing open to find herself in a small, quiet bedroom. "Desmond!" she shrieked, clambering off the bed. The sheets got caught up around her ankles and she landed hard against the old wood floor. She continued crawling toward a wall of the room, her heart thumping wildly in her chest. She reached a small, cracked window and gripped the windowsill, her frantic grey eyes peering outside. All was calm. It was a foggy morning, it appeared no one had yet stirred to begin the day.
Still not satisfied that the clawing hands weren't going to appear and snatch her away, she drew the curtains and sat in the corner of the dark room, hugging her knees, waiting. Was Desmond here? Had he left? She could never tell. But she wasn't about to leave the safety of her corner until he showed up. She looked down at her wrist, feeling a sense of dread flood her as she noticed a hand shaped bruise forming over her skin.
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Post by starrea on Feb 9, 2020 15:32:22 GMT
Desmond was prepared when Freya’s scream cut through the early morning silence. It was early, almost too early for the sun but it’s rays were starting to pierce through the heavy fog. No one had risen yet but Desmond had already been awake for an hour or so. He didn’t used to be a morning person, but Freya’s nightmares had turned him into one.
Less than a minute after she called out for him, Desmond quietly slipped through her door. The latch on the outside of the door and the padlock that locked it hung unused. Freya’s door hadn’t been locked for sometime now but he left the lock there as a reminder. His eyes found her easily in the shadows - her usual spot after her nightmares. He quietly walked over to her and knelt in front of her, extending out a cup of tea he had made her with one hand. The other hand pressed a small, round white pill into her palm. He didn’t have to tell her to take it but his eyes watched for it anyway.
“Shhh,” He softly quieted her, moving so he was sitting next to her on the floor and pulling her into his body, “I won’t let them hurt you. You’re safe with me. You’ll always be safe with me.” As he comforted her, he idly ran his fingers through her hair.
Desmond didn’t discredit her nightmare because he knew who she was what she could do. He didn’t diminish her fears. In fact, when Freya had first come to their compound, he often reminded her how frightening things could be. He needed to show her that he was the only one who could protect her. He was the one who fed her, the one who provided clothes and other necessities, the one who comforted her, and the only one truly cared for her. The other people at the compound weren’t as nice as him. He didn’t just protect her from herself and the outside world, he protected her from other members as well. They had many others ways of subduing her, another thing Desmond reminded Freya of regularly.
Everyone had a role to play and Desmond’s job was to manage Freya. It was an important job and he took great pride in the steps he had made with her compared to when she had first come in. At first, yes, her doors and windows were locked - for her own safety and the safety of others. But somewhere along the way, the lines between their relationship blurred. As much as Desmond had made himself the center of Freya’s world, his own world had shifted to revolve around her as well.
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Post by Val on Feb 10, 2020 1:26:15 GMT
Freya felt an instant blanket of relief settle over her when Desmond swept into the room. His presence equaled safety. Accepting the pill without question, she tossed it to the back of her throat and took the cup of tea with both of her shaky hands, swallowing the warm liquid earnestly. The pill was part of her normal routine, she had never bothered to know what it was. All she knew was that it subdued her overactive imagination.
As Desmond pulled her close, she inhaled deeply, taking comfort in the familiarity of his smell. Desmond was the one constant in her life that kept her tethered to reality. She no longer questioned why he'd become her caretaker, rather she accepted it wholeheartedly and depended on him completely. Her memory of her time at the compound was fractured and blurry. Freya had lost trust in her own memories, often unable to differentiate dreams, visions, and hallucinations from reality. Fear had become an all consuming aspect of her life.
"They grabbed me..." she whispered, watching his fingers trace through her silvery hair. She could remember a distant time when her hair had been a rich, dark brown. Now, it was as though all the life had sapped out of the locks, leaving her with an ashen grey color that didn't make sense in combination with her young and delicate features. Her eyes flitted around the room, "I don't want to be in here anymore. Please."
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Post by starrea on Feb 10, 2020 2:05:31 GMT
Desmond wished he could do something about the nightmares. When she had first come to the compound, he hadn’t really cared when she screamed throughout the night. But something changed over the years and he started to see her as more than just a threat. Then, as more time passed, the nighttime screaming really started to bother him. He had tried talking to some others about it a while back but was told that this was all part of the process and he had to trust it. And he did, so instead he woke up early every morning and prepared tea for when she would inevitably call out for him.
They sat like that for awhile, with his hand gently playing with her hair and her body pressed up against him. “I know, but I got you now. I won’t let anything hurt you,” He murmured again and again.
Her next request caused him to sigh. He knew the compound wasn’t really a home, not for either of them. Ideally, now that she was more cooperative, they would be able to find a more suitable place to live but the rules concerning dangerous individuals had changed due to an incident nearly a decade ago. Now, they liked to keep individuals such as Freya in the compound and under the watchful eye of Big Brother.
Recently, though, due to much begging on Freya’s behalf, Desmond had been granted authority to take Freya off of compound grounds for small day trips. Still, the situation was tense and he didn’t want to abuse it and have it taken away. After another member had used the abilities of a dangerous individual to escape, trust was hard to come by.
“Where do you want to go?” He asked after he had mulled over the options in his head. If Freya wanted to go off grounds today, she was going to have to offer something in return. Desmond would always care for Freya but privileges, especially ones as lucrative as a day trip, always came at a cost.
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Post by Val on Feb 10, 2020 18:26:36 GMT
Freya could feel the sedative taking effect. Her heart rate had gone from that of a terrified rabbit down to normal pace. Desmond's arms felt like a warm cloak, goading her into a more lethargic state. She took a deep breath and finally looked up at him with round, glassy eyes. She knew she was asking for a lot, but she was desperate for some fresh air and she knew exactly where she wanted to go.
"The falls," she murmured, referring to a mesmerizing waterfall location that they had stumbled upon once before. The sound of the pouring water drowned out her unpleasant thoughts and she longed for that numbness. But, more than that, she knew that the trail to the location would allow them to pass through the area that her nightmares had been luring her to.
Before he could respond, she shifted onto her knees and took one of his hands between both of hers, "Please," she begged, "I will do whatever you need me to. I won't even complain, I'll be brave," she insisted, her icy cold fingers gripping his earnestly.
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Post by starrea on Feb 10, 2020 23:02:08 GMT
Desmond pretended to ponder Freya’s request as she took his hand in hers, silently pleading him. He knew that she liked the falls and for that reason, he didn’t grant her wish to visit as often as she wanted. It was also a little bit of a hike to get there, so they could only go when the weather permitted.
“The others will need to come and evaluate you soon. If we go, you need to promise to be on your best behavior for them.” He finally leveraged, gauging her reaction carefully. While Desmond cared for Freya, the other members of the compound did not see the necessity of treating her so kindly. Others who were similar to Freya only received the bare necessities; food, water and shelter. Compared to them, Freya was living in luxury. Due to the incident that happened about a decade ago, other members of the group came to evaluate not only Desmond’s ability to manage Freya, but also her abilities and commitment to their cause. The tests she was subjected to were designed to push her to her limits. Desmond had never once struggled administering or observing a test until after he had gotten close to Freya. Watching her go through the tests was hard for him, but it was a weakness he kept to himself. At the end, sometimes they made changes and sometimes they didn’t. Desmond never really knew what to expect, which meant Freya couldn’t hardly expect anything at all.
He squeezed her hands softly, “I’ll make sure you’re okay. You just have to be good. You have to do exactly what I tell you to do.” He reminded her, trying to get ahead and ease the anxieties that were sure to come with that announcement. That kind of heavy news was a perfect excuse to go to the falls, though, so Desmond got to his feet and gently helped her up. He knew the sedative should have started to take effect by now and while it wouldn’t knock her out, it sometimes made her a little unbalanced and slow.
“Why don’t you get ready to go to the falls and I’ll pack us a lunch. We can have a picnic, how does that sound?” He asked softly, putting his hands on her shoulders and looking down at her earnestly. Out of all the people he had come across, especially the dangerous ones that passed through the compound, he never met someone that he had cared for so deeply as Freya and he couldn’t help but feel proud as he looked down at her.
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Post by Val on Feb 11, 2020 4:54:07 GMT
Freya could feel anxiety build in her at the mention of the evaluation and her eyes glassed over momentarily. She had been conditioned to believe that the torturous experimentation was a necessity, but that didn't make it any more bearable. The more that they forced her to poke and prod at the departed, the more she felt as though they were becoming an indistinguishable part of herself.
The squeeze of Desmond's hand brought her back to the present and she blinked several times to remind herself that she was safe, for the time being. She'd learned to compartmentalize by enjoying the present and not thinking about the bad things if she could help it. Right now, she could focus on the fact that Desmond has agreed to her proposal.
She planted her feet as she was lifted, feeling her head swim momentarily as all the blood rushed upwards. She looked up at him and nodded resolutely, "Okay. I will be good," she insisted. At the mention of a picnic, the hint of a smile curved her lips, "Yes, yes. Perfect. Thank you," she rushed, wrapping her scrawny arms around his midsection in a brief hug. Just as quickly, she pulled away and meandered toward the small piece of furniture that housed her unimpressive wardrobe.
Without bothering to wait for Desmond to leave the room, she pulled her sleep shirt off and began folding it away. Although they fed her plenty, Freya still appeared rather gaunt looking, her ribs just a bit too visible for comfort. She'd grown so comfortable with Desmond that she truly held no reservations around him. Her world revolved around him, so something like nakedness seemed insignificant. She pulled a warm sweater over her head and continued dressing, riding the high that she got from this unusual good mood.
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Post by starrea on Feb 11, 2020 5:11:55 GMT
Desmond knew that she was going to be a good girl because that was what he trained her to be. There were no surprises, no back talk, no fighting. He was her good girl and it pleased him every time she bent to his will.
Desmond pulled her into the hug, pressing her thin frame up against his much larger one. He knew she was appreciative but it made him happy to hear her voice it. No one liked an unappreciative brat and if anyone knew just how bad it could get, it was Freya. He hesitated to leave when she turned away and started to undress, his eyes lingering on her bare chest. He hadn’t taken advantage, not in that way, but the idea always popped back up. But it was inappropriate for a handler to have that sort of relationship with his charge, so he squashed the thoughts. He didn’t miss how thin she was and it was something he was trying to change but keeping weight on her was proving to be a challenge.
“Meet me outside when you’re ready. I’m going to pack us some food.” He left her room, clicking the door shut behind him and walking to their small kitchen. He grabbed a small basket, rifling through the cabinets for dried meats and fruits. They were running low on food and didn’t have a lot of fresh stuff but he threw in a fresh peach for her. In the end, they had an assortment of dried meats, fruits, nuts, and a peach. He made a mental note to try to encourage her to eat more.
Desmond grabbed the basket and stepped outside. The sun had risen and most of the fog had dissipated but the morning air was still chilly. The chirping of birds filled the morning air and as Desmond waited for Freya, he was able to really appreciate the beauty of watching the world wake up. It was just another thing in his life he wouldn’t have gotten to experience if it hadn’t been for Freya.
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Post by Val on Feb 12, 2020 1:06:14 GMT
Freya was lacing up her hiking boots when she heard the front door swing closed, signifying that Desmond had left the house. Irrationally worried she might get left behind, she hurried out of her room and swept through the small foyer toward the front door, cracking it open just a few inches to peer outside. Her eyes drifted left and then right, scanning the area for any signs of the other members of Paragon. To her relief, it seemed that it was still top early for the group to begin to stir, so she quickly slipped out of the sanctuary of their house.
Her footsteps were so light that she practically materialized behind Desmond, "Ready," she voiced quietly, hovering close to him. She took in the sight of the picnic basket he prepared, feeling good about their plans for the day. It was a much needed distraction. Her gaze drifted toward the exit of the compound- one of the several doors installed into the archaic wooden wall of a perimeter that surrounded the entirety of the Paragon settlement.
Just when her nerves began to subside, she heard the sound of voices in the distance. Suddenly her body was in a battle with the sedatives and she gripped Desmond's forearm pleadingly, "Let's go," she urged, but refused to move forward before he did.
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Post by starrea on Feb 12, 2020 1:44:59 GMT
Desmond heard the voices at the same time Freya did and cast her a look. She knew better than to rush him but he didn’t correct her. He pushed her in the direction of the door, handing her the picnic basket, “Wait for me at the door. Do not touch it.” He warned her, giving her one last look before he disappeared around the corner in the direction of the voices.
A minute or so later, he re-emerged, meeting up Freya at the door and taking the basket back from her. His expression was troubled but as soon as he saw Freya, it melted away. When Freya was around, all he could focus on was her. He gently put his fingers under her chin, tilting it up so she could meet his eyes. “Remember the rules, Freya. You hold my hand until I let go. You do not leave my line of sight. You do exactly what I say, when I say it.” He repeated the rules every time they left the compound but he knew Freya was going to be good. He gave a smile of reassurance and laced his fingers with hers.
With that, he pushed open the heavy door and tugged her out quickly and shut the door behind them. It was Freya’s day trip so he planned to let her set the pace. He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze and small, genuine smile as he started leading her in the direction of the path that would take them to the falls.
The hike to the falls was a couple of miles long. The majority of the hike wasn’t that bad, but the last part right before the falls involved some steep climbing on boulders. It wasn’t a location that Desmond had appreciated before, but after seeing how much Freya loved it, he started to see the appeal. Freya was always teaching him new things and he was starting to see beauty in things he had never seen beauty in before.
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Post by Val on Feb 13, 2020 0:34:37 GMT
Freya had retreated to the door as she was told and stood next to it with the basket clutched in both hands, staring intensely in the direction that Desmond had disappeared as she waited. When he reappeared she exhaled in relief and nodded along to the rules, just eager to get out of the compound as soon as possible.
She held onto his hand as they finally stepped into the outside world, feeling an enormous weight lift off of her shoulders as they left Paragon behind. Her pace was slow due to a combination of the drugs and her desire to drag out the journey for as long as possible. She remained a careful half step behind him, wanting to detach their hands, but unwilling to actually pull away from him. Free will was something she did not possess.
Freya took in her surroundings in a detached sort of way, eyes drifting from the treetops down to the soil and everything in between, as though it were a painting rather than real life. It was beautiful, but she felt oddly disconnected from the natural world. Eventually, her gaze started to flicker up toward Desmond's face and her curious nature finally got the best of her, "What did they say?" she wondered, referring to the voices he'd gone to confront back at camp. She knew it wasn't her business, but she had noticed his troubled expression. She noticed everything about him.
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Post by starrea on Feb 13, 2020 1:33:39 GMT
Desmond could practically see the tension melt away in Freya once they left the compound, but he didn’t relax. Not until they put a little more distance between them and the compound, at least. He knew what the other’s thought of his treatment of Freya, so until there was a good distance between them and the compound, she needed to be glued to his side.
As much as he wanted to pick up the pace, he forced himself to slow down to Freya’s pace. He reminded himself that this was for her, and after what he had just been told, he really wanted her to enjoy herself because they both had an unpleasant surprise waiting for them when they got back. He looked over his shoulder, softening at how innocent she looked as she admired everything around her.
Information was considered a privilege, but over the years it had been given more freely. Initially, Freya had not been allowed to ask questions and while he had never specifically lifted that rule, he rarely enforced it. Their relationship had evolved to a point where he was no longer strictly her handler. There was a great deal of trust between them, from both sides. Anyway, Freya was smart. She knew what would happen if she went too far.
He didn’t answer immediately as he tried to decide if he should answer or not. “It was about your test. It’s tonight, when we get back.” He finally said, only because her performance was a direct reflection of him. He hardly ever got the opportunity to prepare her and this test wasn’t anything like she had done before. And considering how long she’d been at the compound and under Desmond’s care, failure was not an option that Freya had.
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Post by Val on Feb 15, 2020 19:54:22 GMT
Freya's pace faltered and she might've tripped and fell if it weren't for Desmond's hand still pulling her along. She wished she hadn't asked. Now, her plans for a good day were tainted by what waited for her when they returned. Her eyes stopped their curious roaming and became fixated on the ground as they walked, getting lost in her thoughts as she often did.
Freya appeared to zone out completely and a long silence fell between them as they walked. She began to recall her dream, the one that had been recurring for several days now. Something strange had been compelling her to walk down this path and they were finally approaching the area that had been haunting her. It wasn't her intention to manipulate Desmond to take her here. Rather, she sometimes felt powerless to resist the forces that plagued her.
She felt the familiar brush of foliage over her skin and lifted her gaze. They were nearing their destination, but her feet abruptly stopped and planted into the dirt. Her head turned slowly and scanned the tree line, "I have to pee," she told Desmond, her eyes snapping back to him and blinking innocently. It wasn't a lie. She told herself she would never lie to Desmond. She didn't want to cause him trouble, but a gravity like force was compelling her actions. She just had to look. That was all.
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Post by starrea on Feb 16, 2020 0:07:42 GMT
Desmond felt her falter at his words but he didn’t turn to offer any comfort. He let the words hang between them in the dead air and pulled her down the path wordlessly, letting all their possible meanings sink in. He could feel a tension between them that wasn’t there before and he felt a twinge of guilt. He hadn’t meant to taint her day but now that the words were out there, he couldn’t take them back.
Seconds lapses into minutes as they continued down the path. He didn’t pay much mind to Freya, who mindlessly let Desmond lead her as she got lost in her thoughts. It was a habit she had that sometimes annoyed him but he didn’t disturb her right now.
He didn’t notice Freya had stopped until he felt her resistance and he looked over her shoulder, slightly surprised. There wasn’t much Freya could do to surprise Desmond anymore. It was his job to know her and it took that job very seriously. So when she said she needed to pee, he didn’t completely buy it. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously but he didn’t say anything. Freya knew the consequences of bad behavior.
He untangled their hands and pulled her in close, cupping her face so she was looking up at him. “I know you’re nervous about tonight, but don’t be. You know I’ll always protect you and I’ll make sure it’s nothing you can’t handle. You’re my good girl.” He held her gaze for another second, staring into her eyes earnestly, before he dropped his hands and stepped back. “You have two minutes. If I have to go look for you, you won’t like what happens afterwards.”
Desmond had always been at the bottom of the chain in command. He had been taking orders and getting his ass kicked for as long back as he could remember. But everything was different with Freya. He had complete control over her life, down to when and where she peed. She had filled a giant, gaping hole in his life that he hadn’t been aware of.
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Post by Val on Feb 16, 2020 2:34:03 GMT
Freya stared back at him, feeling momentarily consumed by his intensity. She felt comfort in his words, followed by stress in response to his threat. He gave her emotional whiplash that she didn't quite understand, but she had not questioned their relationship in a very long time. Still, she felt that nothing he could have said was enough to distract her from what she needed to do.
"Okay," she agreed. As soon as he dropped his hands, she turned and slipped into the thick of the trees, disappearing like a ghost. Two minutes. She fast walked straight ahead, her eyes wide and unblinking as she felt the pull leading her to some unknown destination. She could feel her heart rate picking up and a strange darkness settle over her, as though she had stepped through an invisible barrier into the unknown. Then, after what seemed like forever but in reality was only a quick minute, she burst into a small clearing and came face to face with the entity that was haunting her dreams.
A woman. She was beautiful...or at least had been. Upon closer inspection, she appeared to have been brutalized and a deep gash split had split her throat open. Freya opened her mouth to scream, but no sound came out. She felt frozen to the spot as an icy cold chill ran down her spine. Something horrible had happened in this spot. Silent tears began to stream down Freya's cheeks. She wanted to run back to Desmond, but the spirit wasn't done with her. It raised a hand ever so slowly and pointed a finger, not at Freya herself, but in the direction they had come from. Toward Paragon.
Suddenly, blood began to pour from the wound on the woman's neck and her body began to decay rapidly, practically melting into a grotesque heap. And all at once, Freya was freed from the trance. She collapsed to her knees and let out a blood curdling scream, folding herself into a fetal position as she waited for her protector to come find her.
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